Posts filed under '我們的巧晴 Fannie’s Stories'
生在美國的巧晴，一歲開始吃整顆的無籽葡萄。咬破那脆脆薄薄的皮，就可以和著甜甜的果肉往肚子裡吞。
回到台灣，巧晴一眼就辨認出在桌上圓圓一顆顆晶亮的東西，仍是她的最愛，便急急忙忙指著要我們拿給她吃。阿媽順手剝了一顆葡萄，拿給巧晴。巧晴不斷搖頭，仍一直指著有皮的葡萄，意指她要的是有皮的不是剝好的。台灣的巨蜂種葡萄不剝皮去籽怎麼吃呢? 真是傷腦筋。即使巧晴的手再巧，也還無法剝皮。巧情急得快哭了，我們只好給她一半有帶皮的，告訴她裡面的果肉才是可以吃的。沒想到巧晴氣呼呼地把那半顆用手指尖兒攆掉，堅持要整顆的。阿媽只好把籽悄悄的剔除，給了巧晴整顆帶皮的，擔心她會把皮一股腦兒的吞下去。
看到整顆的葡萄，巧晴高興地塞到嘴裡。擔心的阿媽此時在一旁拼命表演如何吐皮: [ㄆ一 ㄡˋㄆ一 ㄡˋ。Fannie, ㄆ一 ㄡˋㄆ一 ㄡˋ。] 只見整顆葡萄在巧晴的嘴裡轉阿轉，沒一會兒巧晴就怪怪的，似乎發現皮嚼也嚼不爛。多嚼了幾次，大概又看見阿媽的動作，巧晴就把皮給吐了出來。嘿嘿，小傢伙來不錯，皮上沒留有什麼果肉，吃得還頗為乾淨。巧晴如此自然而快速地學會吐葡萄皮，倒是讓我們體會到了學習本是自然的過程。身為大人的我們已經習慣用知識來學習，倒是忘了經歷的本身倒是最強而有力的學習方式。身為父母的我們也通常擔心太多，而似乎忘了小孩學習的潛力。
回到美國之後，巧晴吃無籽葡萄好笑地吐起皮來。花了一些時間，巧晴似乎才又學會這種葡萄的皮是可以吃的。小小腦袋瓜大概充滿了問號吧:[這是怎麼回事?吃葡萄到底要不要吐葡萄皮啊?]。
December 18th, 2005
Fannie’s litte feet are stronger and faster day by day. Everywhere she had been to was messy but full of happiness. This is why daddy and mommy think it is ok to let the little monster scribble on the floor and pull out all the clothes in the closet. Beyond infancy, little Fannie knows where she can find surprises and how she can make wonders.
Fannie likes every drawer, box, shelf, and hole in the house. They are like magic boxes to her. ” I saw mommy getting something good to eat from this. Let me try to open it. Hoops! wrong way. Ok, here I go. Ouch, my fingers. They hurt. Wawawa..wawa…wa.. hmm… Mommy is not looking…no fun to be crying. Let me see what’s inside. Wow…Looks like something fun. Let me dump them out one by one, let me shake them, let me……. Mommy is not coming. Keep going. Faster! Faster!”
Fannie’s adventures usually involve crying: Fake crying, attention-getting crying, really-hurt crying, and getting-bored crying. These cryings usually end up with mommy or daddy’s rubbing Fannie’s fingers, head, or knees, pulling Fannie away, saying “no” to Fannie, or letting Fannie go. It is pretty typical for children at Fannie’s age to use crying as a strategy to get what they want. It is an age when children are testing their abilities to manipulate things around them, and seeking the balance between dependence and independence. Fannie is the same. Fannie cries if we don’t let her play whatever she wants to; She also cries if she simply feels unright. Fannie gets mad if we want to help her with things; She also gets mad if we don’t help. (hmm… why does this sound like me?)
As a parent, I start to wonder how I can let Fannie enjoy her adventures but keep her content and safe. How can I find the balance between how I want her to be like and she might want to be like? It is a unique question to every parent and may be also a question our parents had been asking themselves through our childhood. No parent can do a perfect job since parenting is too much about value and philosophy. How can I ask Fannie to agree on everything we do for her? What I can really hope for is Fannie can enjoy the autonomy and be happy and confident.
Looking at Fannie’s bright eyes and funny giggles, the enjoyment of being a parent is obvious. Yet, the responsbility is heavy. Twenty years from now, I still want to see my girl with that shinny eyes and smiles on her face. As happy as she is fascinated by the adventures, I feel fulfilled.
October 21st, 2005
[ 各位觀眾晚安。沉寂以久的 Godzilla在西雅圖郊區出沒，附近居民人人自危。根據目擊者指出，行動酷似 Godzilla的怪獸，不但搗毀中央車站，破壞網路系統，更襲擊住在該社區人氣指數頗高的香菇韜。此怪獸身形小，行動敏捷，甚難追蹤。怪獸專家指出，小怪獸的年齡應該只有15個月。以目前的行徑來看，將來其破壞性應會更強，活動範圍亦會擴大。現在我們就衛星連線，請記者小燕告訴我們現場的狀況。]
[ 好的，現在記者小燕所在的位置是在香菇韜的家中。Godzilla跟香菇韜已經不知去向，留下了被摧毀的電腦系統和烏煙瘴氣的公寓。站在我身旁的這位是香菇韜的太太。一太太，請你告訴我們到底發生了什麼事?]
[ 哎喲，僥倖喔，香菇韜去給抓走了。我剛剛就去買菜回來啊，啊就看到我尫被一隻不知道是什麼東西壓在地板喘不過氣來。我驚得暈過去了。醒來後，我尫和怪獸就沒去囉。]
[ 一太太，那你可不可以講一下那隻怪獸的樣子。]
[ 那隻怪獸看起來小小的，可是很有力氣的樣子ㄋㄟ。喔，對了，他還有發出一些聲音，很像人在講話。可是我都聽不懂ㄋㄟ。哎，真正僥倖喔。香菇韜對我不錯，菜錢從來也沒有少過給我。嗚嗚嗚...。]
[ 各位觀眾，因為香菇韜的消失，現在一太太一家的經濟情況陷入窘境。熱心的民眾可以打本台的捐款專線 (425)888-0808。現在交還給棚內的盧主播。]
[ 各位觀眾，為了維護居民的安全，警方已經加強警戒雷蒙住宅區，希望這隻行動相當迅速的小怪獸能將香菇韜安全的釋放。受過怪獸語言特種訓練的中情局人員，也透過多種電波，希望能夠跟小怪獸進行溝通。另外，怪獸行為分析家也指出，此小怪獸有攻擊在家長時間使用電腦者的傾向，請有此習慣的民眾要相當的小心。]
後記：巧晴自從會走路後，破壞力也日漸升高。如果說她是到處走走，還不如說是倒處踐踏。加上她活動範圍擴大，常常不是把玩具打翻，就是把家裡的東西包括我們的檔案夾 CD及 DVD等全部弄亂，更別說地毯上的米粒及麵包屑了。除了到處破壞，巧晴還會爬坐在爸媽的身上，蹦蹦跳跳地大笑。我們表現出愈痛苦的表情，她就笑得愈大聲。跟她溝通，要她不可子這樣不可以那樣，只會聽到巧晴連珠炮似講了一堆我們不懂的話，似乎是在辯解自己的行為。當爸媽的只能又好氣又好笑地搔搔頭隨她囉。
September 25th, 2005
友人看見巧晴對我說 “Look at her. Fannie must be a daddy’s girl.” “Daddy’s girl?” 我心想: 巧晴不是我生出來的嗎,為什變成Daddy’s girl? 不過當我看見一向正經八百的爸爸在巧晴面前扮鬼臉裝可愛, 就可以感受到什麼是Daddy’s girl了。許多人都說女兒是爸爸前世的情人。雖然我們並無法驗證這種說法, 不過爸爸對女兒的疼愛通常是非爸爸角色所能理解的 。
這個Labor Day 我們出海到San Juan Island 去度週末。在Ferry上, 我抱著巧晴隔著玻璃看海。好動的巧晴跟本不願意坐好, 動個沒停, 不小心額頭就撞到了窗框。巧晴跟本還沒開始嗚咽, 爸爸就已經臉紅脖子粗的斥責媽媽的不是, 趕忙把巧晴抱過去[呼呼]。雖然只是輕輕的碰到, 爸爸的反應像是心愛的水晶被打破一樣。是爸爸今世情人的媽媽, 真不知該為了巧晴有個那麼疼愛她的爹開心, 還是該為了自己順位的下降感到傷心。
不過即非前世的情人, 巧晴都是值得疼愛的 。巧晴如果吃到好吃的東西, 會分給爸爸和媽媽吃。有趣的是她不會把不好吃的東西分給別人。年紀那麼小, 就懂得分享, 真是特別。有人說女兒是媽媽前世最愛的人嗎? 如果有, 巧晴一定是那個讓我願意付出一切, 換取她的幸福與快樂的人。
September 7th, 2005
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